Cheaters have a way of justifying their actions. Even a thief will give ‘reasons’ why he does what he does but does that give him a pass to go around robbing people?
It is interesting how creative people can get when they are caught in an unpleasant act. There is a possibility that the victim might not even get an apology. Instead, the cheaters love turning the tables from a perpetrator to a victim.
“My wife works so hard that she never gives me time, she only has time for the children and not me,” some men have and continue giving this as an excuse to cheat. It is so disturbing how people do not complain about the income and good stuff the spouse brings home from the hard work. And if the mother to your children is exhausted from taking care of your children, why are you punishing her for that?
“My spouse cheated first and, therefore, I cheat to make it equal,” others say.
It makes sense when you tell yourself that but trust me, the ‘you did it too’ excuse will not save your marriage. The cycle might just go on until you will not even recognize the person you married. Tit for tat or mostly known as an eye for an eye, only leaves everyone blind so do not even use it to justify your actions.
Some people claim they lost feelings for their spouse and therefore, find someone else. Well, does going out to cheat on your spouse guarantee that you will regain your feelings for your spouse? If no one ever warned you, allow me; in marriages, it will not always be about feelings because feelings change.
There are moments where love will not be an anchor for the marriage but respect, appreciation, friendship, and things such as parenting will drive you. If you want to feel the butterflies again like you felt during courtship, you might want to pick a few tips from the many ‘love doctors’ out there other than punishing your partner for your lost feelings.
“My partner is no longer attractive like she was before we got married,” Come on, we all know attractiveness only gets you through the door. Your partner will not always be wearing makeup and heels. There are days she will walk around in pajamas, be too lazy to even shower or take a week without washing her hair. This should not be a sign to revoke your marriage vows but rather a moment to love her for better or worse.
Bottom line, when you get ready to cheat on your spouse, do not try to justify it. Just be honest and accept that you cheat out of your lustful desire and your spouse has nothing to do with it. Own up and maybe you might just save everybody the drama.